Some debates will never die. Like unholy vampires roaming the countryside, they continue to be reanimated and reused every single election cycle.
A few are important issues that have difficult answers, like how best to run a global economy, how to tax people, and where to spend government funds most effectively. Others, however, are all but unanswerable questions.
Abortion, and most other issues about sex, is such a quandary. People seem to be divided in an irreconcilable battle of wills on either the pro-life or pro-choice side.
Virginia's legislature attempted to tip the balance in favor of the pro-life side this week with a simple little bill, aimed at "informed consent." SB 484 makes it a requirement for every woman receiving the procedure to view an ultrasound of the fetus before they abort a pregnancy.
That's not too bad, right? Just a little bit of that jelly you see on TV medical shows, a little rub of that wand, and you're all set.
Not really.
See, during the first 12 weeks, a standard ultrasound doesn't produce anything close to an image that can be used, so a different procedure is necessary. Rather than the little handheld unit, a probe has to be inserted into the vagina and moved around until an image is produced.
Overwhelmingly, most abortions occur during the first 12 weeks, so the vast majority of women seeking abortions would have to undergo this procedure in Virginia.
So get ready, women of Virginia, the GOP has moved beyond just wanting to control your vagina to actively penetrating it for literally no medical reason.
Whether or not you are pro-life or not, forcing women who disagree with you on this debate to forcibly undergo an embarrassing and sexual procedure is not going to help the legitimacy of your cause. You don't get to trample on a woman just because she disagrees with you.
State Sen. Janet D. Howell of Virginia at least tried to level the playing field with an amendment requiring men to undergo a rectal examination if they want a prescription of Viagra. Apparently the old, white Republicans (the main consumers of those little blue pills) didn't think that was necessary.
Why not? People with enlarged prostates might be put at risk while taking Viagra, so why not force the government into a man's ass as well? After all, you can't make informed consent about taking Viagra without a good old digital rectal exam.
Oh that's right, Republicans only let the government make decisions about the lives of anyone but themselves. Anything that has an effect on rich white male Christians is met with shouts of "BIG GOVERNMENT!" and cries of "SOCIALISM!" but anything else just makes good sense.
America is getting tired of our elected officials pretending to be the authoritarian guides on sex, sexuality, and reproductive health. We have the right to have sex however we want without Rick Santorum trying to inject his religious ideology down our throats.
The bottom line is the economy. As it gets better and better, the remaining few Republican candidates will feel the noose tightening around their doomed campaigns. It's not easy to attack Obama's economic policies when they're working. They'll turn to any divisive issue to fire up the voter base, hoping to become the most ideal conservative robot that ever graced the screen of Fox News.
Hopefully for a little while, Romney and Santorum can avoid talking about other people's crotches.
