Hey, wide-eyed, awkward freshman. Yeah, you. Read this column. I wish someone had given me this advice before my first year of college.
First things first.
UB is an incredible place and you'll love your time here. I know I didn't want to go to college here in Buffalo, but I've grown to love it. If you don't fit in right away, don't sweat it. Nobody does.
We may be close to the same age, but I'm going to get my 40 year old on for a second.
You know how everyone says college is going to fly by? It will. I'm going into my fourth semester and it feels like yesterday—seriously—that I was in your shoes. Cherish your time in college.
Map out your classes before the first day of school.
You don't want to be one of the couple thousand freshmen who are unfolding campus maps the first day of classes. Nor do you want to be the freshman walking into class late on the first day. Print off a map online and find out exactly where all your classes are before school is officially in session.
You're going to make friends, but make it easier on yourself.
Listen, you're not some social outcast. Eventually you'll meet some people on campus who you can hang out with. It's substantially easier, however, if you get involved. Join a club. Play intramurals. Maybe even write for The Spectrum (shameless plug, I know, but I'd love to meet you).
I can honestly say that joining the paper was the best move I've made in my undergraduate career. Before I wrote for The Spectrum, I could go a whole day on campus without seeing someone I knew. Now I can't go five minutes.
Be active and keep up with your hygiene.
You don't want to be the guy who smells weird or the girl with yellow teeth. Also, gaining the Freshman 15 is not inevitable. You can avoid the pounds if you go over to Alumni Arena and use your free membership to workout. Everybody wants to look good at their high school reunion. Might as well get started in college.
Party hard, but work even harder.
I'm not saying you can't party because, let's be honest, you're going to party no matter what. But pay attention to these words: work harder than you party. It'll pay off. Trust me. Go to all your classes and hand in your assignments when they're due.
It may not sound exciting, but it's why you're here. You need to take your future seriously. I have a friend substantially smarter than me – this kid's brilliant – who didn't take college seriously his freshman year. He goofed off and got kicked out of school because of his GPA.
I'm interning at a television station and something one of my mentors said stuck with me: "I wish I'd worked harder in college so I could have a better paying job."
Oh, one more thing…be tremendously wary of parties on South Campus. I've been robbed at gunpoint and I know a handful of other kids who've experienced trouble in that area. Be careful.
Never, under any circumstance, drive drunk.
I've seen way too many good college students get in trouble with the law. It's not worth it. Crash at a nearby friend's place or call a taxi. Just don't get behind the wheel.
Show some school spirit.
Get out to as many Bulls games as you can. They're always a great time and they take your love for this school to the next level.
Find the balance – don't sleep with everyone; don't fall in love with one person.
I can't make this sentence clearer: do not sleep with everyone you're attracted to. Pregnancies and STIs are easier to obtain than you think. Plus, you'll get a reputation as a slut or a man whore and, although you might think you'd enjoy that reputation, you won't. Don't be that guy.
Also, don't focus all your time on one person. You're young. It probably won't work out long-term. Too many kids waste a couple years of college focusing completely on a relationship that doesn't even work out in the end.
You will find attractive people on campus.
There are a lot of beautiful people at UB, that's undeniable. I know you think you have your game on tight, but this is college – it's a whole different stage. "So, Aaron, how do I get that person's attention?" In this age, there's an easy way to learn about someone without appearing creepy. You know what I'm talking about. Facebook. Find someone in your class attractive? Pay attention to that person's name if attendance is called and check Facebook to see what he or she is into.
That doesn't mean you should add that person as a friend. That could be creepy.
Do not ever use a pick-up line. This is class, not a nightclub. In addition to the Facebook method, just pay attention to the small things – how does this person dress? What kind of music is he or she listening to? Hold doors and say "God bless you" if that person sneezes. If you have a (clean) tissue on hand, offer it. It's worked for me. Not kidding.
Get a part-time job.
Maybe, like yours truly, you're paying your own way through college. Get a job and save some money so you won't have to take out all the loans offered to you. I'm not saying to avoid all loans, but I've found that one a semester is a good amount. You don't want to get in to too much debt.
Maybe you're lucky enough to have your parents paying your way through college. Get a job for a little extra spending money.
No matter who you are, if you get a job, you'll meet more people and gain valuable lifetime experience.
You will face adversity. Take deep breaths.
Push through it. Everyone gets stressed out at a few points every semester. You'll be just fine if you work as hard as you can and remind yourself that "what lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us," as Ralph Waldo Emerson once said.
Apply the advice and succeed.
I can't say that these years are the best years of your life because, well, I don't know what the future holds. But these are some damn good years if you take college for all it's worth.
Email: aaron.mansfield@ubspectrum.com
