James Howard Kunstler is scaring the crap out of me.
The author of "The Long Emergency: Surviving the End of the Oil Age, Climate Change, and Other Converging Catastrophes of the Twenty-first Century," a novel about what he sees as an impending oil crisis, allowed an adaptation of his book to be included in this week's Rolling Stone. It is three eye-opening, slightly liberal paranoid pages that made me pretty glad I'm a-okay with Tonawanda, N.Y., locomotives and block parties.
What's shocking about Kunstler's words isn't any sort of slant or outrageousness, it's the "foregone conclusion" tone he uses, writing with an optimism weathered away to reveal a "pick up your shovel and deal with it" mentality.
Let me lay it out for you with some guidance from Kunstler's article, who also wrote "Geography of Nowhere: The Rise and Decline of America's Man-made Landscape" and "The City in Mind: Notes on the Urban Condition"-read: Jimmy knows what he's talking about.
"(America is) Lost in dark raptures of nonstop infotainment, recreational shopping and compulsive motoring. Even after the terrorist attacks of 9/11, America is still sleepwalking into the future. I call this coming time 'The Long Emergency.' "
Somewhere in the hum of Jennifer Lopez's love life, the crackle of low-rise jeans and the din of "The Bachelor" and "The O.C.," our country has sank back into the "normalcy" that we all yearned for so dearly after the attack on the Twin Towers.
Nothing could be more dangerous. I'm not saying we should be living in fear of terrorism, but I'd like an e-mail from every single reader who gets genuinely concerned when the Justice department referee pulls out the nuclear yellow card.
Exactly.
It doesn't matter if you are a conservative figuring you'll be kept safe despite the warnings, or a liberal figuring you'll be kept safe because it's obviously a conspiracy to keep our minds off "the man's agenda," we're inactive. It takes a resounding trumpet of victory or a devastating pile of defeat to get us moving, and $2.29 a gallon just isn't doing it.
Months, weeks, sometimes even days later, we're checking out "Seinfeld" re-runs.
Ever see the one where a narcoleptic Kramer gets dropped in the Hudson?
"Is America prepared to contest for this oil in an Asian land war with the Chinese Army?"
Good question, right?
Kunstler says the U.S. reached its oil peak in 1970, and that today we import two-thirds of our oil, a figure that becomes closer to 100 percent every day. 2005, he says, should be the year the world reached its peak production.
The world.
The world is a tricky place to be American. Kunstler contends that our failing battle to be a stronghold in the Middle East could be complicated by China's advancement over Japan to second place on the list of world oil consumers.
He says that should China choose to walk over to the Middle East with its massive armies and demand a controlling stake in oil, no one will have the power to say, "No."
Note: I wrote power, not gumption. Gumption is deadly in Texas.
Still, I can't see any official taking steps of the magnitude in human loss. Even our strongest of leaders would step back before conceding to some heightened source of American pride.
While this does assume continued failure overseas, perhaps we should all consider getting used to idea of alternative means of energy. Hybrid cars get 60 miles to the gallon. No, they don't look like SUVs, but I guess you'll have to run over small children in a less expensive looking car.
"We will surely use solar and wind technology to generate some electricity for a period ahead, but probably at a very local and small scale... Our lives will become profoundly and intensely local... Suburbia will come to be regarded as the greatest misallocation of resources in the history of the world."
Some of our "patriots" rip on Pope John Paul II, who was a driving force in non-violently eliminating communism from Poland, laying the foundation for Eastern Europe to move away in a similar manner. We wouldn't want to respect a man that took major steps to rectify a dangerous gap between Christians, Muslims and Jews.
This is where we are now, hating and making light of anyone or anything that doesn't fit in our narrow-sighted goals. We, no matter who we are, have the correct blueprint for success, and those not onboard can either take a joke or take a boat.
A boat?
God knows jet fuel is too expensive.
Kunstler says that our cities will crumble without oil. Our skyscrapers will no longer be energy acceptable and cities like New York City and Chicago will fall hard and fast. Cities like Detroit and Cleveland may be prepared for, as the author explains, they have already begun their falls from super metropolises.
It's important to realize that Kunstler isn't trying to be apocalyptic: He's simply taking the reigns in drawing up an outline for our future. I'd bet any amount that he'd love to see the oil issue resolved, the Earth's core proven to be full of petroleum.
My gut instinct is that he's pretty much right on with his criticism. I categorize myself as a worrier, but that doesn't mean I want to be right. I personally would be fine with more agricultural production in my life, and I'd gladly push aside my world travel dreams to live alongside a true community like the one my parents moved into in 1985, where block parties, lawn chairs and neighborhood was common.
T.O.T. for life, baby.
There's an urgent feeling inside, and we're too worried about how "stupid" Students Against Sweatshops looks to care. It's sickening. Don't rise up for what you believe in, just sit back and wait for the ice caps. It's slow, but relaxing, like Yanni.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to drive 25 miles for the best tacos in Erie County.
"If there is any positive side to the stark changes coming our way...Years from now, when we hear singing at all, we will hear ourselves, and we will sing with our whole hearts."
Photo: Meredith Forrest Kulwicki
