"Tank, I need a pilot program for a B-212 helicopter."
Trinity's eyes flutter and years of knowledge are pressed into her brain from the world of The Matrix.
How far away from this are we? Will schools be completely unnecessary in the future because all knowledge can be implanted? Will we only be as smart as the programs we can afford? Will parents have to save up so that their children can get a Kant or Plato chip? Will television shows one day subsidize all those costs in order to make people smarter in an effort to gain ratings?
If our society were based on intelligence instead of looks, that scenario would be slightly more likely. Instead, we have new shows on Fox and MTV called "The Swan" and "I Want a Famous Face."
MTV is merely along for the ride in the pageantry of surgery, asking viewers if the surgery was a "hit or a miss." They are following around several patients who want to change their physical appearance to be similar to established celebrities such as Jennifer Lopez, Pamela Anderson and Elvis Presley.
Ironically, the patients gain the fame they want - not as themselves or as their celebrity of choice, but as some spawned hybrid. Viewers gawk and applaud the work of the surgeons.
Are we supposed to feel better if some random person now looks more like a celebrity?
Fox's version of the show is obviously tackier, and involves several judges choosing the winner of a mini-beauty pageant.
The women cling on to an ideal "beauty" and their final victory is not how they feel about themselves but how several judges feel about their ability to compete.
But what is the purpose of beauty pageants? Are we supposed to judge who has the most natural beauty or who worked harder to become beautiful? Even natural beauty needs upkeep and work to stay fit, but introducing produced contestants weakens the entire process.
Life is a constant struggle between those who are born with things - whether it is beauty, political connections or athletic ability - versus those who work for everything.
Which side is more fascinating and interesting? Once someone is at the end point, does it matter how he or she got there? Do the ends justify the means?
Unfortunately, I have no answers. Soon, shortcuts will be a part of life, and people will be accepted if they perform a task adequately, regardless of how they got there.
It is the difference of hating George W. Bush because he had political connections from the start and never put in the required effort to be President, and hating him because of his political decisions.
There are several other difficult questions. First of all, the elevation of "beauty" as a deciding factor of societal acceptance is fickle, but not a new criticism. Unfortunately, sending people to three months of chess camp for a televised competition and chance to become a grandmaster simply doesn't draw enough viewers. But that does not mean it is a worthless exhibition.
If the same shortcuts of plastic surgery can be applied to mental pursuits, would the school system cease to exist? I should hope not. The learning process is still necessary, and would invariably lead to new discoveries and innovations. If we can quickly achieve higher pursuits and apply them, our society could move forward at an extremely fast pace.
Further down the slippery slope we will be implanting memories and experiences. If there is a way to make someone know the complete works of Shakespeare, what is preventing us from implanting something saying they grew up in New Jersey, took a trip to the Grand Canyon when they were 11, or had any other combination of vacations, pets and siblings?
The New York Times Magazine provided a look at memory inhibiting medication in order to prevent post-traumatic stress disorder, and the ethical questions could barely be contained.
Today these questions are only about brains and newer faces. But now that this dilemma has been hurtled into the mainstream, how long until we are tweaking brains and comparing the natural smarts and years of education with those provided by a doctor in an instant?
There is a huge can of worms tucked inside Pandora's Box, and both are opening at the same time. Our new society might not just be around the corner. It might already be in our living rooms.
Photo: Meredith Forrest Kulwicki
