These were the first words out of comedian Cocoa Brown's mouth as she walked on stage of the Student Union Theater at Black Comedy Jam:
"How y'all doing? All 25 of y'all."
Although the crowd was small at Black Comedy Jam this past Saturday, the laughs were plentiful. The size of the crowd did not stand in the way of the quality of the show that was organized by the Black Student Union.
Three talented girls from the BSU started the night off with a dance to Usher's "U Don't Have to Call." They also made an appearance in between Turae Gordon and Cocoa Brown's performance, presenting a dance to Missy Elliot's new song, "Work It."
Gordon, a rising comedian from the streets of Philadelphia, was the first performer of the evening. He attended Temple University but never graduated.
"People from student loans calling me," Gordon explained to the crowd. "Well I ain't get my degree so we even."
He mocked the people working at student loans even further, commenting that they can find anyone and suggested that they look for Osama bin Laden.
Gordon obviously enjoys making people laugh for a career and has no qualms about why the job suits him.
"Comedy is the best job you can get without a drug test," he said.
Gordon proceeded to make jokes about fast food establishments and said he does not understand the concept of the paper hats that the employees must wear:
"You got the paper hat. It's square, my head is round," he said.
Gordon came from a rough neighborhood, and talked about how walking down his street was perilous because of the constant fear of being robbed. The perpetrator, he explained, would go up to his victim with a gun and say, "It's already a robbery, don't make it a murder."
The victim then would respond, "S--- yeah, that's 50 percent off."
Gordon reached to take off his gaudy gold chain necklace as he told the joke and went on to say how people used to be afraid of jail, but how now it is like a country club.
"If I get locked up, I can work on my GED."
Brown came on stage after Gordon and immediately chimed in on how she did not understand why guys go after really skinny girls. Being a larger woman herself, Brown said:
"That little skinny girl got nothing to offer you to eat. She got a lot of clothes from 5.7.9, but she got nothing to offer you to eat. Did you ever see them real skinny girls with their legs looking like parenthesis?" she asked.
Brown then waddled across the stage imitating the emaciated girls but then switched to the other end of the spectrum and began to make fun of fuller women.
"Big girls," she proclaimed, "should not wear thongs. You can't see them."
The comedian did not discriminate - she took turns mocking all kinds of people, cracking jokes about the blind, the deaf and the mentally challenged.
"I didn't know my girlfriend was deaf," Brown noted. "Whenever we was at the club, I'd be like, 'Holla back, youngin'!' and she would never say 'Woo-hoo!'"
Brown had no problem making fun of herself, a good quality in a comedian. It shows that they are not afraid to let loose.
"I got a little bit of a gut, but when I lay on my back, I swear I look like Janet (Jackson)," she joked.
Brown proceeded to take the spotlight off of herself and moved on to men.
"There's that one dude who's 25 and still a junior. He takes like one class a semester so he can see what the freshmen look like," she said.
She said that whenever she goes to a bar, all the Caucasian men offer to buy her drinks because, "White boys like some hooters." She compared that with the preferences of African-American males who prefer a big posterior on their women.
After the show there was a snap contest. Participants from the audience worked to come up with quick, in-your-face insults. The winner won $25 and a T-shirt with this prize-winning snap: "Tell your mom to stop wearing different colored lipstick because she is leaving a rainbow on my d---."
Other memorable insults were: "That n---- so black, you put plastic over his head, he would look like a pack of soy sauce," and "Yo mama is so old, she dated Jesus."
Photo: Meredith Forrest Kulwicki
